A 100% serious April 1st joke, by BobaBoard™
Made of solid maple, the hime boasts an impressive size of 4 ½ x 20 x ¾ inches—or, if inches don’t work for you, the length of almost exactly three PS4 games lined one after the other.
At 8 ½ x 4 x ½ inches, the chibi is just above one single PS4 game. We also don’t exactly know what it’s made of, but we love it anyway.
Each Fujoboard is made to order and personally engraved by Ms. Boba with her trusty laser-diode engraver, then coated with the slickest food-grade mineral oil for your personal enjoyment and (food) safety.
After the engraving process is completed, each Fujoboard is coated twice with food-grade mineral oil, making them (to the best of our knowledge and web-search ability) safe to eat off.
Of course, Fujoboards are intended first and foremost as decorative items, and you ultimately assume all responsibility for any unorthodox usage.
All Fujoboards are strictly NSFW: Not Safe for (dish)Washer. They come pre-coated with food-grade mineral oil, which should be periodically refreshed.
Fujoboards are made to order on a first-come-first-served basis. At this time, it’s extremely hard to estimate demand: last April 1st we thought we’d sell 10 ships, and eventually sold more than 200.
We have a modest amount of paddles ready to be engraved. Should demand exceed this supply, we’ll need additional time for more paddles to be sourced and shipped to us. Should we not be able to source enough of the current type of paddles, we’ll find a worthy substitute, inform buyers, and give them a chance to revise or cancel their order.
In short: we’ll do our best, but please don’t rely on Fujoboards for any time sensitive present-giving. Keep an eye on our social media channels (and your emails) for updates and don’t hesitate to contact us.
Hopefully yes! Unless this turns out to have been a really, really bad idea, I plan to keep this store open for the time being.
Just beware: after the first wave of paddles is done, the price is likely to increase. Fuck it, same price, more paddles for everyone!
The general inquiries
We’re glad you asked! BobaBoard is an upcoming social network (currently in alpha) that lets you create moderated, privacy-oriented online communities designed with an eye to the needs of transformational fandom.
If you want to know more, don’t worry: we made a whole website about it.
Since its inception, BobaBoard has spent a significant portion of its budget on sourcing its artwork from artists within fandom. Recently, as the amount of organizational and software work picked up, we’ve moved to hiring fandom folks as software engineers and consultants.
And we have no intention to stop.
In semi-recent times, a modern-day hero (not to be named without permission) kickstarted a nostalgia-driven production of new yaoi paddles, similar to the ones that used to be sold at conventions. Unfortunately, the response from the original company was to block production of these paddles, despite not having sold them for years.
Without debating the validity of the company’s claims regarding the legality of these new paddles (which, our lawyer friends tell us, can be easily questioned), we simply couldn’t accept seeing such a symbol of our shared heritage made unavailable to the public.
So here we are: a new batch of paddles, reimagined for a new era. Because you really can’t—and shouldn’t!—copyright writing "yaoi" on a piece of wood.
Finding high-quality, affordable stock images of people representing the full spectrum of diversity of the fans we wish to serve. And of course, photoshopping a significant amount of yaoi paddles into them.
While the result might not be perfect, it’s the product of a hardworking team of volunteers who have spent the last weeks combing through countless stock image websites to find the right pics. Without them, this website wouldn’t exist as it is.